My addictions are getting the best of me once again... I fell into the trap of looking a porn... I thought hey I can look at the porn and not get aroused.... Since, I am not interested into sex anymore... Wow, what a complete jackass I am to think that... I ended up looking at more and more of the porn and got aroused completely... I ended up cumming and what not... I knew I still had problems with my addictions of porn... Because I was having dreams of sexual encounters with many women... I was in complete denial of myself... I'm still back at phase one... I'm starting back at where I left off... I was hurting big time awhile back and I'm not to far from that spot again... I need to step up to the plate and be honest with my sexual fantasies...
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing my sexual desires to get the best of me... I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to look at porn... I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to masturbate and cum to the point I was satisfied... I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to beLIEve I was done with sex... I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be in denial of myself on beLIEving I was done with looking at porn... I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be dishonest towards equality and oneness... I forgive myself for accepting and allowing my mind to control me ....
later
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